Saturday, March 31, 2012

Alexander Wang toga for sale!* Who's ready?

 If you ever wondered what Barry Manilow would look like in an Alexander Wang toga...
 Overlooking the limp appendages,  THIS IS ONE COU-TOGA! And it can be yours! It's new (other than this brief stint on the fairly freshly showered model), it's silk, it's got an attached cotton undershirt in the manner of the better dressed Romans! I left the tag on for cred and you can feel free to do same -- it says $575, but a manager's special makes this reinterpreted wonder of the ancient world available to you for a mere $100. One clam.  A month's wages, but worth it! And now I'm going to create a sense of urgency by saying it's available for one week only before I am carted off by the FCC it reappears at My Sister's Closet in uptown where you will pay, I don't know what -- maybe a million $$$$.
And now for the fine print: This thing is the devil to get into. What you thought was a stylized rendering of Che Guevera above is actually the Kitty's attempt to show the theoretically functional row of five silk covered buttons and their corresponding loops. Above that, the undershirt has a short zipper, and the surplice part of the skirt that crosses underneath the top gathered part thereby covering the privates (assuming no alighting from chariots) is secured by an outrageously discreet hook-and-eye.  It's a size 0 and senor Wang was not whistling Dixie with that assignment -- the waist measures 24-1/2".  Also tatas are not recommended or supported.
*You know when Apple announces they will out with a life-changing product on January 27th, and they do?  Yeah well, that's not happening here.  In researching what it takes to run an online business, I liked all of it except for the business part. Thus, instead of a boutique, I'm opening my overcoat. It's not illegal unless I cross state lines. Or enjoy it. But seriously folks, if you're at all interested in giving this very fine toga a home, leave a comment on this here blog and we can affect an equitable transaction.

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