Friday, January 6, 2012

I am Joan's sternum

She oughta work out, right?  Mercy. As Master of Torsos, Joan warmed up the reserved, not very drunk NYE crowd at Mystique 2012. You already know more about her than your high school prom date, but here's some other tidbits -- i was up in her business at the 2011 Envision fashion throwdown where her assets were similarly appreciated (it's her MO, sheesh). And she's a style blogger herself, chief cook of And I think she owns Secrets Fashion Agency,, which sounds a little sketchy (ha, get it? fashion? sketch-y? yah, sue me) but it's no secret, Joan is out there and knows how to get exposure.  I know my 12 sick followers good friends are on board.
The Almost Dress was made for boob tape her by local designer ArielSimone. Or Adrienne Yancy. I'm confused.  If you had a fancy name like Adrienne Yancy, why would you hatch one like Ariel Simone? What witness protection program? Ooooohhhhh, oops. Ok so hurry on over to Ariel Simone's (wink wink) website or or Cliche in uptown before they she disappears. Word, shine up your sternum and polish the old cellulite before you go to Cub in these creations.

No comments: